TURNING FEAR INTO FUN!

Hello from Sunny L.A....

I'm writing to you as I fly above from warm and sunny LA. on my way to Salt Lake City, Utah to spend an amazing week at the Sundance Film Festival. What an exciting and exhilarating time for me as I meet so many new and wonderful people, explore new places and stretch myself far outside my comfort zone.

I've thought so often of all of you -- our growing EvolvingArts Family -- and pondered what I'd share this week in the My Cup of Chi newsletter. What aspects of these past few days would I choose to highlight? What tidbits of wisdom have I gained in the past several days? What lessons that I've embraced would you most likely find helpful for your own lives?... Honestly, there's far too much to write during this short flight. But let me begin with my continued amazement at the power of pushing through FEAR...

Fear. That's right. Fear. It's the pervasive feeling that keeps most of us stuck in place, creating the hamster-wheel momentumless spin through life that we all wish would stop, but are just too darn scared to do otherwise. But why is this? Why do we avoid living our dreams and embracing all of life's bounty? Why are we shivering in our britches? Just how bad could it be to "face our fears and do it anyway", as they say?

Reality is far different than the stubborn beliefs that are keeping us in our own unique holding patterns. Deep down, if we're brave enough to be bluntly honest with ourselves, we think that moving into our deepest fears would do us in, poof us into a puff of smoke, shriven us deep into the ground, or make us squeal and bolt for the door. It's these dramatic images and intense emotions that whisper "Stay where you are, play it safe, and everything will be just fine. No rockin' the boat today, baby -- it's a dangerous, dark world out there so stick with me kid, and things will all be fine".

Yet, as a representative of someone who's jumped off the cliff of the unknown a few times now, faced many of my GREATEST fears, and lived to tell the tale from the other side, I guarantee that little voice is a big, fat, GIANT liar. After this week I continue to see more and more clearly the power fear has played in my life, how much it has held me back, how much pain and stress and depression it has caused, and how comically silly these fears are once I've shined the light of bravery onto them. They're nothing. Empty. Powerless. And outright silly.

About two years ago when I first met my Fun Shui producer Amelia, I was your typical "Play It Safe" girl. But I could sense there was more, and I was finally brave enough to tell the world I was ready for it. But even though I had shouted to the Universe "BRING IT ON!", when the real deal came my way... well, I basically wanted to pee my pants. I was scared. I was terrified. I had thoughts like: "I'm not good enough. I'm not pretty enough. I'm not thin enough. I don't know enough. I'll be too nervous. People will find out I'm a fraud. Something bad might happen. I simply can't live through this amount of physical and emotional discomfort." And to be honest, I almost lost the show.

Then one day Amelia called, after a few months of me stalling, waiting, preparing, and hoping the terror of being in front of a
camera (and all of America) would go away. She finally said the magic words: "Babe, maybe this just isn't meant to be". Well, that moment was the longest second of my life. Like the classic "life flashing before your eyes" scenario, it literally happened. But I didn't see my past. I only saw my future. I saw the end - myself on my own death bed - and I had a good long look at that inevitable scenario. How will I feel, lying there at the end of my life, having run from this opportunity? What am I most afraid will happen if I let this opportunity go? How will I feel if I DO take this opportunity, yet might possibly end up failing miserably and making a ginormous boob of myself on national television? How will I feel? How will I feel? How will I feel?".

And it hit me. Like a brick to the head. No humiliation, failure or ridicule could ever top the feeling of letting fear rule my life. So instead of my previous stalling, I started walking boldly forward, scheduling a film shoot, making the plans, and preparing for the day. I was scared, but I did it anyway. I felt sick, but I showed up. I wanted to hide, but I pulled myself together and moved forward.

And the rest is history. My fears were unfounded. And I'm now finding out that when there is great fear, there is also great passion and fulfillment just lurking underneath. We are afraid of those things we care about. We are scared around situations that could bring us the most joy. And so this is what I experienced this past week in LA. Once again, I stepped up to the plate and walked head-first into a whole new level of fears - speaking with people that would previously have rocked me to the core. Talking about ideas and trying on new adventures that I couldn't have even daydreamed about just a few years ago. And here's the great news for all of you: IT GET'S EASIER!!!!

The more we practice moving through fear, the more our mind starts to learn about truth about reality. And trust me, truth and reality are far different that the garbage that rattles around in our brains. You come to see that the fears are unfounded. Life is here to support us if we step up and embrace what things come our way. It is kind, not out to get us. The more we understand this, on a deep cellular level, we become capable of taking on challenges that we previously believed would kill us. We strengthen our muscle of bravery. We easily become capable of great things, great projects, great love, great compassion, and great joy and fulfillment. Life's colors go from the basic 8-crayon box to the super-swank 64 box with the sharpener built into the side. There is a rainbow of complexity and magic and abundance beyond our wildest dreams, just waiting for us to open our eyes and take the needed steps. And all of this wonderment is just a belief away.

So what's your next step? What's your next fear to push through? What one jumped hurdle would bring you immense joy?

I am living proof that it is possible. I have lived in limitation. I have lived in fear. And I still do at times. But I have also begun to experience the very opposite. May you too all march to the other side of fear. Join me on the other side - it's still a bit lonely over here -- we could use a few more members. I'll be here when you arrive!

© 2008 Stephanie McWilliams LLC

ADJUSTING YOUR SPACE FOR THE "FUTURE YOU"

Many of you have noticed that I'm always talking about adjusting our spaces as a way of manifesting in our physical environment. When we create spaces that speak to who we imagine ourselves to be in the next several years, we create a continuous, inspiring, encouraging home or office that helps keep us feeling entitled, energized and focused on our greatest goals. What we think about, we bring about. And our space can have a great deal to do with how we manifest our dreams.

Take a look at your space right now.... What do you see?... How would
you describe it? If your home or office was a person, what kind of
personality and temperament would they have? Is it focused, bland,
empty, Zen, frenetic, lively, intense, bold, pretty, sweet, delicate,
powerful, heavy, light, small, expansive? Put words to what you see and
feel about your surroundings.

Then take a look at YOU. Where are you right now in your life? Where
would you like to be? What traits do you have that are keeping you from
that dream? Where do you sense or notice any imbalances or extremes?

Once you take note of these traits, you can then being to create your
plan, your focus and your intention for your new space. To give a
clearer example, let's take my home as a sampling of what I mean....

When I first started feng shui, I lived with 3 other roommates in
cramped, dirty quarters and sleeping in a bedroom that was 100% stark
white. I was struggling financially, struggling with my weight, and
struggling with my self-confidence. Then I read "The Western Guide to
Feng Shui" and started making my space beautiful. I surrounded myself
with pretty things, rich textures, and inspiring artwork. I added soft
pastel pinks & yellows to the walls. I did the best I knew to do. And I
felt better, I got a great new art directing job, my finances tripled
and I was losing weight! Not bad... not bad indeed.

Then I met my teacher, Jackie -- after helping me manifest a new, more
expansive, mature (and FAR more beautiful) apartment, things REALLY
started to blossom. My space expanded, and my life expanded right along
with it. But I brought all the things, colors and beliefs from the
previous apartment. At least, that is, until Jackie's next visit.

Jackie opened my eyes to what I was creating unconsciously. What I was
most struggling with was self-confidence, yet deep inside I am a
strong, passionate, dynamic woman. My environment (and my internal
mental gremlin) told a far different story. Jackie helped me see that
the colors I chose were still soft and gentle, and where I was wanting
to go in my life was far from that. I needed clarity, focus, energy and
drive. So she helped me design a space that was bold, beautiful and
dynamic. Within no time at all, I saw the effects of this energetic
influence on my life. My relationships transformed, my career was
booming, my income was going up and up and up steadily, and I was
feeling more like the confident woman that I'd always imagined I could
be. It was this design and this bold dose of confidence that I
attribute as a large part of what allowed me to manifest "Fun Shui" so
effortlessly. What a blessing beyond words...

But after shooting a tv show and all the intensity and time that went
into making it, the experience had left me needing more quiet and R&R.
I had been working so much that my space and it's arrangement spoke to
a woman who worked all the time. And that's basically how my life was
going. So once again, Jackie to the rescue! She saw what I needed. She
intuitively felt where I was, and where my body and spirit longed to
go. And she helped me create a space that spoke to that next step in my
evolution and path. With a calm Zen airiness and simplicity (yet with
an equally bold blast of fire and fame!) she's once again helped me
design the "medicine" for my home and my life. I've spent much of this
New Year's time sorting, purging, releasing and repainting in order to
allow my space to once again become an inspiration. Thank you Jackie,
thank you Universe, thank you Megan & Lauren (who have spent the entire
week with me painting my ceiling red!)

My point in telling you this is to help show you:

1. How having help and support when transforming your space is vital.
Even I, a feng shui practitioner myself, need a neutral outside party
(just because I can see other's homes clearly doesn't mean I can
necessarily see my own blind spots). We all need that external mirror
to help reflect our imbalances, shine a light on our beauty, and to
inspire us out of our comfort zones and on to the future that awaits.

2. How important it is to always be open to the flow and change of
things. As our lives unfold, our homes must too in order to provide us
with the forward inspiration we so desire. Your space will NEVER be
done. As long as you are alive and breathing, your home will be
evolving right along with you...

3. The powerful results that can be achieved through powerful shifts in
our environment. I believe in feng shui because it has worked for me. I
believe in feng shui because it has changed my life. And there's
nothing better than that...