I've Been Cheating on My Boyfriend

It's true. I've been having a love affair...

with coffee.

Ok, ok, perhaps it's not as juicy as you were hoping. But it's just as internally turmultuous. Here's the thing: I love coffee (don't worry, Ian...I love you more!). My focus goes to coffee several times a day. I worship it. It's my religion.

"It's your RELIGION?"

Yup. That's what I said. The definition of worship is "to love something deeply". Whatever in our lives we think about and give our focus to is what we worship (which might be rather disturbing news as you come to realize you're actually spending more time worshipping your email, to-do list, cell phone, shoes, food or coffee, INSTEAD of God [or whatever word you use for that mysterious and magical something that makes the universe go 'round]).

But it's been 3 days now. No coffee. I took that brave leap and listened to that whisper in my ear that has been telling me for months to cut back on the ol' joe... And it's been a challenging past three days. But what I've come to realize is that what we're drawn to is very likely exactly the thing that keeps us stuck. We're drawn toward foods, stimulants, people, spaces and colors that exacerbate where we're already out of balance, and just end up intensifying that energy.

For example, I tend to be quite energetic by nature (who knew?!) with a very fast, racing mind. So what I'm drawn to intensifies that imbalance. I like coffee, I like kickboxing, I like running. I avoid drinking, downers and yoga, simply for the fact that they force me to slow down and come into balance. So I fight it. My boyfriend on the other hand is very low-key and grounded by nature (sometimes TOO much so...sorry honey!), and of course he's fond of meditation, drinking (when he was younger), and any slow-paced or innert activity. Coffee for him is out of the question.

So, that being said, what's your tendency? What activities do you avoid? What types of colors are you hesitant to use in your home? I'm not saying to go out and do yoga, or smoke pot, paint your ceiling purple or drink yourself silly.... It's a matter of acnowledging that quiet inner voice that knows what would be healing for you, and allow it space to speak. The more you give it that space, the louder it gets, and the more you're capable of acting on it's wisdom.

In terms of feng shui, the same applies. Because your brain, in this very moment is where it is, and has the beauty AND imbalances that it has, we make choices from THAT place. So if we were to redecorate our space from where we are right now, very likely we would imbue that space with whatever strengths, and definitely whatever weaknesses, we currently hold. (This is why it's so beneficial to find a good consultant who can look past your personality and get to what your soul's longing for, and help you generate a space for those longings to blossom - a consultant who's continually doing their own inner work, staying clear and trying their best not to project their own issues or limitations onto your space.)

That being said, true change can feel uncomfortable. Sticky, icky, and heeby-jeeby. But deep down we WANT change. That's why we're on the planet! So we want to surround ourselves in inspiring spaces that stretch us out of our comfort zones so our homes aren't just a redesigned dumping-ground for more of where we are right now. That only creates more of that hampster-wheel-of-life effect. Although to create a space that speaks to who we WANT to become can feel as challenging as...well...choosing green tea over coffee! It's a new energy, a new feeling, a new behavior being asked of us, and that forces us to step up to the plate and create new patterns, behaviors and pathways. But however uncomfortable initially, that's the great news! Our homes can inspire change and growth... and often times it's far easier to change through changing our homes, than it is to change by changing a lifetime of limited beliefs.

So be prepared to feel a bit uncomfortable when you're taking on any new, healthier behavior. Your ego may throw a temper-tantrum. "I can't paint THAT color on the wall! I can't wake up early and write in my journal! I can't eat healthier! I can't get organized!...I can't survive without coffee in the morning!"

So what's right for YOU? What could you do to your space that would inspire something great in yourself? What does that small inner voice tell you to do each day that you simply choose not to listen to? What little thing could you change that you KNOW would change your entire life?

Would it be...
...painting a new color on the wall?
...making your junk drawer beautiful, with lovely containers and labels?
...throwing out magazines or paperwork you've had filed away for ages and tell yourself you'll get to someday?
...fixing a chair that you've grown acustomed to being broken?
...throwing out old clothes that you've been hanging onto for years?

What change could you make that you KNOW deep down is a positive shift, but you're hesitant to change? Yup, that's right. THAT is precisely where you want to start...

Baby steps, baby steps...

And before you begin this adventure, always keep in mind the following: as long as you're alive, your home will be growing and changing along with you. So continue nuding yourself and your home forward, and most importantly... HAVE FUN!


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